I’m Susan – a counsellor, wife, mother, grandmother, and dog lover living in the outer suburbs of Melbourne.

My journey as a caregiver began with helping my mother (who suffered with depression) look after my younger brothers who were 10 and 11 years my junior.

I had three children under six by the time I was 30 years of age.

In my late 40s, when my mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, I helped my dad care for her. As the only daughter, the expectation to take on the role fell to me rather than my brothers. After my mum passed away, my dad and one of my younger brother’s were both diagnosed with cancer in the same week in 2014. I cared for my dad until he passed in 2015 and supported my brother through his 11-year illness, during which he sometimes stayed with us and even lived with us for over a year. He sadly passed away in April 2025.

While my choices came from love and my values, I often felt angry, frustrated, and unappreciated, and guilty for feeling that way. There was a constant pressure, especially as an older woman, to put myself last. At times the sadness and overwhelm led me to drink too much. On the outside, I appeared to manage it all, but inside I was falling apart. When someone showed genuine concern and asked how I was, it broke something in me, and I realized I needed help.

I found a therapist who validated my feelings, helped me understand how my nervous system responded to stress, and gave me tools to manage it. I also learned to set boundaries without guilt. Through self-education, counselling studies, and my own therapy, I’ve learned to feel my emotions, to ask for what I need, and to let go of the belief that I have to ‘fix’ everything. I know the grief I carry is a part of my story, as my parents and two of my three brothers (one older and one younger) have all passed now.

Learning is an ongoing process for us all. We do our best with the tools we have.

Often, we have little choice as we are expected to take on the majority of care duties. We do it for love, but it is too often taken for granted and the impact on our lives is minimized.

This is why I am passionate about helping other women through their caring journey.

If you need support reach out through the contact page for a free 20-minute chat.